Hard-edged tough chick Drea de Matteo — you know her from “The Sopranos” (and maybe “Friends” spin-off “Joey”…Anyone? Anyone?) — will be the next woman in desperation to take up residence on Wisteria Lane as a series regular, Entertainment Weekly is reporting.

Not moving far from her “Sopranos” roots, de Matteo will be the head of an Italian household, and will be married to a landscaper and have a “tightly wound” son, according to EW.com’s Michael Ausiello. Both of those roles have yet to be cast, but as long as they’re good actors, I don’t care who they are. I just can’t wait to get some “Sopranos” gangsta action to the ‘burbs.

I am SO excited for this move, and here’s why: Every town has its village idiot, right? Wisteria Lane is no different — except they need the village slut. Edie’s dead, so who’s going to take on that title? I’m thinking Drea’s character is going to take a lot from Edie role, but will be stronger and bring a rougher, more masculine housewife to the show.

Yay!

P.S. I’m calling it right now: She and Susan are NOT going to get along.

Image: Pacific Coast News

So we’ve already established that things are a little wonky (a little?) between Bree and Orson, what with the impending divorce and all. Now that Karl’s in the picture, slutting up the scene and having an affair with Bree, things are even more complicated.

Apparently, Bree’s not the stone-cold tough lady she kinda seems to be, and she’s going to face some stress about breaking one of those Ten Commandments. (Wait, infidelity is one, right?)

According to Mickey O’Connor from TV Guide, Bree will turn to “an old friend who you might have thought was out of the picture.” Well, let’s see….all her previous husbands/boyfriends (Rex? George the Pharmacist?) are dead…..

Who could it be? Wait….Zach Young??? Could it be?? That was one of my BIGGEST problems with the first season, is that he and his father just…went away. Now that I think about it, I’m fairly certain it’s gotta be Zach! Right? Maybe?

Who do you think it is?

Image: CTV

There’s been a lot of buzz around this ABC promo showing former “Lost” cast member Dominic Monaghan foosballing it up with Courtney Cox, Patrick Dempsey and Ed O’Neill:

The rumors began, naturally, with Charlie coming back to “Lost.” Yet Michael Ausiello from EW.com reported that there’s a reason ABC is using Dominic in the bit, and it’s not because he’s coming back to the island.

“The real reason Monaghan is featured in that cheeky spot is because he’s actually joining the cast of another hour-long ABC drama series as a full-time series regular,” Michael wrote.

I, of course, (and should) have a one-track mind and immediately think “OMG, CHARLIE IS COMING TO DH!”

What do you guys think? Michael was sworn to secrecy by ABC, but when I hear “hour-long ABC drama,” I just can’t imagine any other option. “Brothers and Sisters”? “Castle”? “Dirty Sexy Money”? “Private Practice”?

I don’t know, I feel like I could see a pretty adorable romance between Dominic and Julie Mayer. (That is, if we ever get to see her again.)

Also, should I mention that I cried for two weeks straight when Charlie was killed off “Lost” and would be the happiest little blogger in the world if he came to “Desperate Housewives”? Color me biased, but….

And I mean BIG. As in — don’t keep reading if you don’t want to know. If you WANT to know, click here or follow the jump!

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E!’s Ted Casablanca is reporting that there’s been some buzz about a ‘wives spinoff — and Kathryn Joosten (Mrs. McCluskey) is rumored to be one of the people studio execs are considering for the new show. She’d be starring with Lily Tomlin, and presumably they’d start their own the old-lady P.I. biz?

Although I love watching these two on the show, I can’t really seen them hacking it for their own series. The No. 1 reason? (Don’t get mad, sista’s just statin’ facks): They’re not hot. Entertaining, yes. But spinoffs seem to be all the rage these days. Would you watch a DH spinoff? Who would you pick for it?

Image: CTV

I love Dana Delany. Sure, I really don’t care for her character on the show, but I DO love that she can’t keep from spilling secrets. I’m pretty sure that she wasn’t supposed to share with E! News that both Jackson and Mike are going to propose to their respective women. Wait that’s Jackson proposing to Susan, and Katherine to Mike, in case there was any confusion (which wouldn’t be that surprising if there was, considering the histories.)

Yes, that’s right. I said Katherine proposing to Mike. She kind of alluded to the fact that Mike might not be doing the asking to Kristin Dos Santos from E! during the GLAAD Media Awards.

“Actually, the proposal is very Mike-like. That’s all I’ll say. Before you get too excited, consider this: Just because there are two proposals doesn’t necessarily mean there will be two answers of ‘yes’ to those proposals, or two weddings,” Dana said to Kristin.

I’m thinking Mike will say yes, Susan will say no?

Image: Bauer Griffin

Desperate Housewives ‘Look Into Their Eyes and You See What They Know’
Air Date: April 19, 2009
Liveblog/recap

Aight, kids. It’s been waaaaay too long since we last did this, and I’m extremely excited for this episode. I’m excited even though I just stopped of at Wendy’s for a Frosty, and they were all out of chocolate, so I had to get a vanilla Frosty. Why do those even exist?? But now I’m here, with Neighbor Peggy and Friend Erin, and we’re ready to see the first episode of “Desperate Housewives” in a month.

9:00: Yes! Edie’s narrating. “What can I say? It was one of those days.” The only people who’ve narrated the show have been dead. Mary Alice, Rex. Is she dee-ee-dee ded?
9:01: Yep. Less than a minute into the show, and my soap-opera-coma theory is already wrong. Edie really is DEAD dead. Wow. That’s….it?
9:02: It suddenly occurred to me that maybe this is what Dana Delany meant when she said “dead doesn’t mean dead.” Edie’s going to take over for Mary Alice? I mean, her character is totally moot at this point, right? Nicollette’s leaving the show for good, though, so maybe not.
9:04: So are we going to see all these happy stories about when Edie was fun and nice with everyone? Don’t get me wrong, I loved Edie, but she wasn’t the girl next door.
9:05: “Funny and likes to gossip? We’re going to get along just fine,” -Susan. Uh-huh. Yup. Until you BURN EACH OTHER’S HOUSES DOWN?
9:06: Thank the high harlotty heavens! Edie just said she was sleeping with a married neighbor. Good thing we’re not having happy-memory time like the 100th episode, with Eli Scruggs.

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I just have two questions about this photo of Teri Hatcher at the Thursday’s premiere of “Hannah Montana: The Movie.”

1. Why was she there? According to IMDB, she’s not in the movie. …so why was she there?  She brought her 11-year-old daughter Emerson Rose along with her, so I’m hoping she’s just using her celebrity connections to get her daughter into a premiere? Because, that’s awesome…and I wish I had a famous mom who could get me onto red carpets.

2. Perez Hilton took some jabs at Teri’s face in these photos. I got a little angry at first, in the way that you get angry at someone who makes fun of your little brother/sister (”I’M the only one allowed to make fun of them!”), but then I thought about his claims that Teri has had some, uh, work done. She does looks a little different. Do you guys think Perez is right?

Image: Bauer Griffin

Neal McDonough, the man who plays Crazy Dave Williams, talks to TV Guide — which is cool because we don’t normally see much out of this actor in the way of interviews. And he seems like a down-to-earth, less-than-crazy, normal guy, doesn’t he?

He confirms that Edie will not only die, but that she’ll die in the NEXT EPISODE. He wouldn’t say that Dave kills Edie, or anything more details about her death, though. I’m super, super excited for the Camping Trip of Death that Crazy Dave is orchestrating.

“She’s going to have a fantastic send-off,” he says.

OMGCANNOTWAIT!!!

I’ve got a bunch of AWESOME video sneak peaks for you kids. I can’t wait for this episode. We get to have a buncha flashbacks to what made the ‘wives what they are.

First, my favorite sneak peak:

“Baby’s arm is sticking out, why don’t you high-five it?” — Tom.

Sneak peak 2:

Hey! I just realized it’s been a while since we’ve seen that much of Edie Britch. Every time I see her in a bathing suit/bra/low-cut dress (OK, so it hasn’t been that long), I think, “Man…she’s 45.”

And for the promo: